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VW Technical Glossary

dickt

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Thanks for posting that.

I think we ought to start an addendum to the Technical Glossary.

1. Bodywork. Whilst this is supposed to fit together nicely with consistent gaps between panels, we decided to Experiment with the Golf Mk 7, so you need to check your body panels for correct fit. If you don't care, don't expect us to.
2. Windscreen Wipers. We told our supplier that we needed cheaper ones. In the spirit of Innovation, with a bit of Aftersprung, (as opposed to Vorsprung), the supplier came up with a design that just doesn't work. Brilliant Techniq.
3. Memory seats. Another great bit of Innovation. We said in the brochures that Golfs could have 3 position memory seats.
We were lying. We got all the money in for these seats, and decided that we would not fit them at all. They only belong in cheaper cars, like the Passat.
4. MPG. Clearly this is an area of focus for our Research team. They have done brilliantly. In 2013 we launched our great new Diesel engine. It cannot do the same mpg as the one we launched in 2003. 10 years of progress for worse mpg. Quite brilliant.
5. Rear wash wipe. An excellent bit of Innovation here. We decided to let the water from the wash system dribble all over the rear window all the time. We agree it looks messy, and can cause you to run out of water, but, hey, that's your problem, not ours.
 
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