While plodding down the middle lane doing 6mph over the limit on my cruise control, bumping my Helix to some New Order, some infant in a clapped out new mini something with white racing stripes pulls along side and revs up his muffler delete to proudly proclaim that his fully sagged headliner was not the extent of shitary going on. I look over and he’s laughing at me. I start shaking my head in old person disappointment and he gets real mad reviving his shit box up. To indulge him I rev up a couple times slipping the clutch. His eyes squint and snap back onto the three lanes of mild traffic ahead, dumps the throttle, and WHAAAH he starts to pull away. After a car or two gap opens up I flash my hazards as a clear indication of “you never had me, you never had your car” to confuse the moon pies and bong water rolling around the otherwise empty cranium. He drops back and starts mean mugging me. I slip down to 4th to allow my snow-grate-less-turbo sing the song of it’s people, venting the stock bypass a couple times to let him know I mean business of some sort or another. I give him the nod and... beep.. beep.. beep.. then in a massive rush of power I plant the throttle then slip the clutch right back into 6th. Clapped out boy crawls faster and faster and faster while I settle back down to 66mph on the cruise.
He rounds the bend with his hazards flashing showing all around him that HE is the one that took the win. Clearly attracted by his flashing lights, the Ford Police Intercepter hanging out in the center divide responds with his own flashing lights and a drastic acceleration to catch up to the self proclaimed winner... clearly the lame-o SUV felt he needed to establish his dominance as the real winner tonight.
Sadly the clapped out child didn’t know that this section of I-494 always has a speed trap or three.
.
He rounds the bend with his hazards flashing showing all around him that HE is the one that took the win. Clearly attracted by his flashing lights, the Ford Police Intercepter hanging out in the center divide responds with his own flashing lights and a drastic acceleration to catch up to the self proclaimed winner... clearly the lame-o SUV felt he needed to establish his dominance as the real winner tonight.
Sadly the clapped out child didn’t know that this section of I-494 always has a speed trap or three.
.
