“Ladies, is it really that serious?” he asked, as only someone who has the luxury of walking down the street mostly unbothered can. An overwhelming number of women commented on his page to say, basically, “Yes, it’s that serious.” Then they detailed their experiences of being yelled at and called out of their names, spit at (that’s my story) and even assaulted for not saying “Hi,” not smiling on demand and/or daring to ignore a stranger who calls out to a woman, not by her name, but by her most jiggly body part.
After reading all those testimonies, he was still incredulous. Unfortunately, not in the “I can’t believe this happens and I, despite having a mother, a wife, a sister and a teenage daughter, never noticed!” kind of way but in the “I’ve never seen any men do that, so it must not be happening!” kind of way. So many guys, even the so-called good ones, don’t get it, or perhaps they don’t want to. It would require an entire shift in the way many men, even unconsciously, view women.
It’s hard to make it into adulthood as a woman and not interact with more than a few guys (not the elusive strangers on the street who can easily objectify you because they don’t know you) you actually get to know, think are pretty cool and then realize their startling views on women. Too often there’s the guy who loves his mom and perhaps you, too, but can’t refrain from using the words “female” and “bitch” when he’s mad at you. When you dare to complain about his use of “female” or “bitch,” you pretty much get what my Facebook friend offered: “Is it that serious?” For some men, anything that requires them to change even a bit isn’t worth the effort.